Another Excerpt from BD

So my re-write is totally kick ass. I mean really, so much more content! Evan really comes back to life and shows every bit of his personality. It's really great and it makes me happy to see his entire perspective again. He's still inhibited compared to Andria because he's thrown into a fantastical world, her world, so she's the one watching over him. He doesn't mind her watchful eye because he trusts her, but he also has that itching to be the Alpha male, per say. I'm sure no man really wants to be overruled by a woman, but Andria doesn't do that. She treats him with equal respect and trusts him as well. Evan is still learning and adapting, but he's doing it with manly style, I guess you could say. What I'm trying to say is that he's not a sissy. He's just slightly fearful and overwhelmed by his new life. He's still assimilating.

I watched Gossip Girl tonight, although it had apparently started last week and I wasn't aware. But I saw that the author used the when-in-doubt style and killed off Bart Bass. I thought it a grand move because I had no clue as to where the story could go from there. It was in a hole, but not now! I'm excited to see what the author wrote next. I've never read the books, so I don't know how closely the show is related, but it has a lot of eye candy and that's what got me hooked. Jenny is my favorite, with all her fierceness and independence. That's mainly why I watch it. She went a little nuts, but I think we all did at fifteen. Talk about some awesome makeup too. If I were to wear such dark eyeshadow out in public, as I wish I could, people would call me a freak. Not that I care what they really think, but I would like to be taken seriously. I'm going to get nowhere in the writing world with such awesome makeup, that's for sure. As far as I'm aware, the writing trend is too much coffee, drabby clothes, and zero makeup. I hate to fall into that. Oh well, at least I'll have my awesome converse to keep me sane.

Here is a random excerpt from my re-write. Here we have A & E's first meet 'n' greet:

During first period, Andria decided to give Evan a little test to see if he was actually interested in her whatsoever.

She got to his second period class before he did – again, like a stalker – and leaned against the wall a little ways down from the door where he was sure to see her.

The crowd in the hallway was dense, so she was having a difficult time watching out for Evan. She felt him approach before she actually saw him. This time he was by himself, which made things a little easier on her. She wouldn’t have to fight off any haters to talk to him. He was walking towards her from the opposite side of the door from where she was leaning. He went to walk in the classroom when he felt the paranoia. He looked up and found the eyes that were heavy with affection.
Andria’s eyes, hoping and praying he would find her and come over to her, allowing her fears of his marker to subside so she could easily make a decision about him.

He hesitated for a second, took a deep breath, and walked over to her. He scooted along the wall away from the crowd and stopped a few feet in front of her.

“Hey,” he greeted.

The warning was still very prominent in his aura and her nose wrinkled. Now that she had an educated guess concerning the smell of his aura, she didn’t have the urgency to run. She was still wary about using him as a food source, but that wouldn’t be a problem. She wanted to be with Evan, not drink his blood.

“Andria,” she introduced herself as she held out her hand.

Evan wondered why she was introducing herself. He already knew who she was, seeing as how he said hi to her in the mall. Although hearing her introduce herself made the situation a little less imaginary and a little more real to him. Too bad he was in shock.

“I know who you are. I’m Evan,” he said.

He took her hand, but didn’t shake it. Actually, he kind of just stared at her. He liked it though, the feeling of her hand. She made him feel calm, but underneath he could still feel the panic. All of a sudden, he got the strange idea that maybe she had not been waiting on him, but someone else. He was sad at the thought.

“Were you waiting for someone?” He asked her as he looked around the hall.

“I was waiting for you,” she said truthfully.

“Oh.” His blood did that wonderful pooling thing in his cheeks. Her insides felt like they were in space. She was floating.

“I heard you were talking about me,” she told him. It wasn’t a lie. She had heard him talking about her.

“Oh,” he said again. It was all he could say. He really wasn’t sure what to say because he wasn’t sure what she had heard.

Andria figured that either he wasn’t very good at conversation in general like Marcy had said or he wasn’t very good at it with her. She gave him a quizzical stare.

“Oh, no I mean I wasn’t talking bad about you or anything. I was just … uh, I was only trying … actually I don’t really know why I was talking about you.” He finally stuttered out.

She drew back from him a little hurt, but more confused. He had asked Josh about her, but now he didn’t even sound interested. She figured she had raised her hopes for nothing and now she was no longer floating.

“Oh, okay. Well then I’ll see ya.” She turned to leave.

“No wait,” he reached out to touch her shoulder but then thought better of it. He wanted to fix whatever he had said to hurt her. “I didn’t mean what it sounded like. Don’t leave, I just … well, you make me nervous and when I’m nervous my words come out all jumbled.” He looked really sorry for being confused and even though she wasn’t actually able to influence minds yet, she still felt responsible for his confounded behavior.

“You have every reason to be nervous,” she told him a little too menacingly.
Evan looked worried and possibly a little terrified. She made it sound as if she was supposed to make everyone nervous.

The one-minute warning bell sounded, telling us how long we had to get into our next class.
Evan hastily put aside his fears and nervousness and attempted to make their last seconds count. The only thing he could think to say was, “Have lunch with me?”

His question took her off guard shortly, but her intuition told her to agree. “Okay,” she agreed.

He smiled. “Meet me…”

“I’ll find you,” she cut him off. She gave him a smile and walked away and as she did, she began to float again.

He started to ask her how she would find him, but then stopped. She obviously knew what she was doing and for some odd reason he trusted her. He took one step after her involuntarily because he didn’t want her to leave. He wanted her to stay with him and make his heart stop hurting. He wanted her touch to make him feel calm as it had before. But he knew she couldn’t stay. She had her own class to go to, so he went into his own.

After the conversation with Andria, Evan was reeling. He still wasn’t paying attention in class, but not because of a broken heart. His heart was beginning to heal slowly; he could feel it. But he felt that if he didn’t see her again soon then it would start hurting again. Good thing he was seeing her at lunch.

Then he began to panic and began to wonder what he was going to say to her. He had no idea how to talk to her. Actually, he was surprised he even had the guts to ask her out. Well, technically, he didn’t ask her out, just to eat lunch with him, at school, in the cafeteria, with a crowd of other people. But he would take it, anything to be close to her.

Lunch couldn’t come soon enough that day for either of them, but for Andria it wasn’t about what she was going to say to Evan, but what she was going to tell the others. She hadn’t factored them into all of this and now she was beginning to regret talking to Evan. She wasn’t sure what she was more afraid of, the others not understanding or them hating him. If she were to just simply go up to them and tell them she was infatuated with a human, she wondered what their responses would be.

She knew Marcus would probably freak because he hated humans and didn’t think mixing species was right. He not having been human in eight years was probably another factor to what she thought his reaction would be. Kelley would probably say it was none of her business and go back to reading her book of the day. Sarah on the other hand would be thrilled that Andria was following in her footsteps. Sarah always wanted her to be her “wingman”. Now Robert. He was tricky. Robert and Andria were the closest out of the others but still she wasn’t sure what he would do. He was not a very emotional person, but he was a good friend. She thought he would support her. Their opinions mattered a lot to her because they were like a little coven, although not really.